First of everything

I've been a paramedic since Dec 2017.. i work in a slow area (+/- 5000 calls/year) in 10 months, ive seen some stuff but last night, it was my first DOA.  Yea i know, people will say "we see dead people all the time blablabla" well for me, at 37, it was my first.  No i didn't had nightmares....nor had issues sleeping and honestly, that what scares me the most.  Some co workers told me it could hit me anytime.  But will it hit me at all?

update -- 10/10/2018

I had my first cardiac arrest... on arrival at the ER, pt was still having electric activity so it means, we kept the pt alive...  and yet again, no feelings, no nightmares.... some strangers on a dark humor medic / rn Facebook page told me that if I didn't have feelings, it means I am at my place... now lets try to have a permanent full time place...